This morning I spent it at the hospital doing all the usual pre op stuff.

First....10 vials of blood drawn. 10 VIALS! Happy to say, that although I am WAY dehydrated, everything there looked normal.

Second...Anesthesia. If I could walk around with a permanent IV drip of Versed, then I would be one happy camper!

Third...Doctor. This was the kicker. Could be I go home the same day, but chances are, will be there 3 days. Could have an up and down incision or side by side incision. Could need a bowel resection. Might have lymph nodes removed. Possible to have cancer. Definitely having out both ovaries. Hmmmmmm....do I pack a bag or not for the hospital??

Fourth...more blood drawn. Yes, that's correct. Another vial. They never did test my blood levels for ovarian cancer (hitting myself on the head). Of course, this could be an indicator, but may not be an indicator.

So, what did I learn? NOTHING!

PS. My doc just called to let me know my levels were low for cancer indicator. What does this mean? She is feeling much better about my ovaries, but those darn parts could still be cancer!

PPS. She is being really nice to me. I wonder if my divorce attorney talked to her...we use the same one.

Nirvana aka Target

Today I discovered Niravana. It was a dream come true. I wandered into this place by accident, and found a shoppers paradise!

Sheesh, not Target itself! Of course I've been there!! The kitchen section of Target!!

For those of you that don't know me, I don't cook. In fact, I only go to the grocery store when it is absolutely necessary. My poor kiddos live on pizza and chinese and the occasional fried chicken. If anyone wants to have me over for dinner, we accept all invites...my kids are hungry!

But, I have a new blog, I Want 2 Make This!, and it involves making crafts. So, I needed some pots and things for the kitchen. Since I don't cook, my kitchen accessory drawers are pretty barren, and having avoided the kitchen section of Target for the last 42 years, this was an eye opening experience.

300 dollars later, my drawers are no longer barren and they are filled with fun colored whisks, thermometers, graters, spoons, spatulas and clippie thingies! Some new pots are in the cabinets and new knives are in the knife block.

Thank you Target for this wonderful shopping experience. Will I start to cook? Doubt it, but I will try making soaps, candles and lip balm in the kitchen! Now...how do I turn on the stove??

Don't you love pictures!

I LOVE when I get pictures in the mail! (Thanks, Mom!!)

Usually, I am the one behind the camera...that is when I remember it, and then the pics are all on the computer and don't get printed to ever put in a scrapbook. Of course, the pictures from the Family Honeymoon Cruise (yes, we took Brattitude and DD) are printed and still sitting in a pile. Scrapbooking is also something I never get around to doing.

Anyhoo, my brother was the official camera dude in Vegas, and my Mom, who DOES get the pics printed out sent me some yesterday. YEAH!!!

Here are a few that I scanned in for your enjoyment...Okay...for MY enjoyment, but hey you get to benefit too!!


Me and Hubby at the party Before Vic & Anthony's.


Me and Mommy, isn't she cute?


The Fam....minus my older bro and sis in law. Note my younger bro...note that he is single...anyone know any nice Jewish single gals for him?? He is a *catch*!!

Just wanted to share!!

Wordless Wednesday

Committed

We did it! Hubby and I have been looking for a house, lot, underpass, or any place that is a good place to live for a LONG time!

Here is some background info...hubby has some commitment issues. Case in point...we dated for 3 years. He gives me the ring (and it is really gorgeous) and says let's get married. We set a date. One week before the date, hubby says he isn't ready. We cancel the wedding.

Case Study number 2. Hubby lived in Washington DC. Part of our relationship was that I could not move. This was a decision made by the wonderful divorce courts of Texas. They don't let the mom move. He was *just about* to move about 4 times and couldn't do it at the last minute. Once he said he just couldn't get on the plane, and a couple of times he canceled movers the day of!

So, as you can see...if hubby says it is going to happen, NEVER count your chickens first!

We have been under contract with several different properties over the years. And, this last lot, we were under then over then under again. FINALLY we close today! Now, this post could be premature, because as you now know...hubby and commitment don't mesh.

BUT, if he doesn't commit, then he is going to be committed! I feel like we are doing a bad hokey pokey. GET ME OFF THIS CRAZY RIDE!

So, we have an architect and the seedlings of a plan for the lot. We lovingly refer to it as our "bowling alley". Long and narrow, but it will be all ours. We drive by often and gaze at the house that is decomposing on the lot with love. We imagine and talk and dream. We put our right foot in and then take it back out.

The seller is sick to death of us...can't blame him and at this point the mere fact that he is selling it to us is a miracle in itself!

So, today we go and sign the papers. We get the keys to our bowling alley. We work on plans and who knows...maybe in 5 years...hubby will commit to actually building!

This is a Tough Week

This is a tough week for me. For those of that don't already know...most of you do know this...I am divorced, so hubby is step daddy and daddy is ex #2. The month of July my kids spend with ex #2. Which is in a day and a half.

Normally, this is not so emotional for me, although it is always difficult to let your kids go for a month, but this time I am also having major surgery. The bright side is that I know my kids will be taken care of. The dark side is that I don't want them to worry and if they were home with me, then they could see me get better every day.

I am sad that they will be leaving. I already miss them and they haven't left yet. I am nostalgic and overindulgent because of it. I think this surgery, which takes place in a week is a major factor in this as well.

I have to board my dog because hubby will be at the hospital with me, which will be for almost a week, so no one will be home to take care of her. This is another person to miss.

I have so much to take care of, and working for myself and not being able to blog for a while adds stress to this week. I feel I need to get all my ducks in a row. I will be home after a week, but pretty much bed ridden for 2 weeks after the surgery. This means that I won't be having computer time. This means not being able to fulfill sales or ebay sales. This means major stress!!

Then there are my blogs. One I just started, and it is gaining momentum and I hate to stop that smack dab in the middle, and the other one, this one is finally getting comments and friends, and I hate to stop this one as well! I will be back, but it will be hard.

And, finally, the surgery itself....

Let's just say I have been sick for the past year and after many many tests the conclusion is that my ovaries are not so good. I have already been through cervical cancer, but honestly that just entailed taking out my cervix and uterus. I am not upset about losing the ovaries, so much as worried about what they are going to find.

I am at the best hospital for cancer, MD Anderson, with the best doctor. I am not worried about the hormonal changes, but I am worried about the big C. This won't be just getting rid of the ovaries, but could mean many months of treatment, being sick, losing my hair and other things.

I have to be able to take care of my kids, my hubby, my business, my blogs, my dog and my life.

This week the pressure is on to get everything organized before the big surgery and saying good bye to my kids for a month. I can only handle one day at a time this week, and if I could sleep it would make it easier, but I can't sleep eat or think right now.

Taking deep breaths and lots of Tylenol and just hoping to get it all done.

The Many Faces of Brattitude

Brattitude is a 5 year old boy who is an imp a love a pain a joy and everything in between. He screams like a girl laughs like a loon and has eyelashes that make your heart melt. He knows all the words to Queen songs, Abba songs and even some Rod Stewart. He says he sings as good as they do. He is coordinated with sports and scared of his own shadow. He still has dimples instead of knuckles and a squishy butt. He fights with his sister and cries when she fights back. He talks back knows everything and is never wrong. He knows when to be sweet and is afraid of no one and nothing. He is the most precocious cutest precious kid in the universe, and if you ask him, he will tell you how cute he is. He makes you laugh smile and groan in frustration. He is my son and I love him.

Here are the many faces of my brattitude boy....

Look Mom! No hands!!



I'm stronger than the dog!



I'm such a monkey!



A young Richard Nixon.